The seventh Sunday of the NFL season has come and gone and with it so have the upsets, triumphs, and humiliations of pro football, let’s get into this…
Tennessee Titans 27- Kansas City Chiefs 3
What kind of TikTok dance do you choreograph to the sound of disappointment? Jackson Mahomes is going to have to figure that one out for the family after his brother Patrick and the Chiefs slumped to 3-4 on the season. The fall from grace we’re seeing in Kansas City right now is either the greatest calamity or the start of the greatest revenge tour ever, and only time will tell.
Green Bay Packers 24- Washington Football Team 10
Remember after Week 1 where we all thought Aaron Rodgers would just spend the season giving the Packers front office the finger? Yeah I think we can all be comfortable with being wrong on that one.
Cincinnati Bengals 41- Baltimore Ravens 17
Who dey? No seriously who was that because it certainly wasn’t the Cincinnati Bengals we’ve seen over the last few years. Joe Burrow and his college bestie Ja’Marr Chase made the Ravens look more like hummingbirds. With both teams now at 5-2, the Bengals are atop the AFC North and if (yes this is a big if) they can keep this up they are certainly not a team anyone wants to see down the line.
New York Giants 25- Carolina Panthers 3
Name a better duo than Sam Darnold and getting benched at MetLife Stadium. The former Jets QB found himself riding some familiar pine after a dismal day at the helm for Carolina where he was outplayed in all facets of the game by his counterpart Daniel Jones. Jones didn’t just win the QB duel, he also came down with the catch of the week off of a sneaky double reverse play.
Atlanta Falcons 30- Miami Dolphins 28
If you’re going to leave Kyle Pitts in single coverage with the game on the line in the last two minutes you deserve to lose, it’s that simple.
New England Patriots 54- New York Jets 13
There is nothing I could say that would hurt worse than the humiliation of THAT performance by the Jets.
Las Vegas Raiders 33- Philadelphia Eagles 22
Apparently the easiest way to get right is to cut off the dead weight of a toxic coach, or at least that’s what’s worked for Vegas, who after starting undefeated looked shaky in Gruden’s final two games, but are back to their winning ways since his departure. Their win became even more impressive when you realize they were doing it without Darren Waller and eventually Josh Jacobs, two integral pieces of their offence.
LA Rams 28- Detroit Lions 19
I wonder if the quarterbacks went to the right locker rooms before kickoff…Beyond that, it was Stafford who got revenge on his former team as the Lions continue to be winless on the season. It wasn’t for lack of trying by the Detroit coaching staff who called an onside kick and a fake punt within the first eight minutes, and the team executed both of them to perfection.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 38- Chicago Bears 3
Matt Nagy should be the most scared man in America after the Bears put that product on the field, including Fields’ performance itself. The rookie QB threw three picks while his counterpart, a certain Tom Brady, threw his 600th career touchdown pass (a ball that Mike Evans promptly gave to a fan and then had the grounds crew negotiate back for.)
Arizona Cardinals 31- Houston Texans 5
Houston has problems far beyond the QB position, namely that they’re a bad football team. So bad that no amount of return on whatever Deshaun Watson trade they manage to pull out of the sky could salvage this season, even in the joke of the AFC South.
Indianapolis Colts 30- San Francisco 49ers 18
Imagine sitting through a torrential downpour for your team to only play two quarters of football? Just ask your local Niners fan! Jimmy G got the team off to a flying start in the first, took the second and third off, and tried to claw back in the fourth. But in a run-heavy game where you’re playing against Jonathan Taylor, you might want all four quarters.
What was your highlight/lowlight/oh-my-god moment of the week? Let us know on Twitter @unbenched_